Masturbatone

The muscle tone one gets from masturbating frequently and rigorously……….

see example……

Girlfriend... no, why do you ask?

I am a big proponent of having a hobby, but in every crowd there is always gonna be that one guy who just takes things too far and ruins it for everyone. Look at this guy, can you guess why he isn’t wearing a shirt? Could it be because he is cleverly carrying newborns in his biceps? Women, hands up who think this dude is super attractive….. yea – that’s what I thought.

Basically he’s gone and created himself a vicious vortex of self destruction and ultimately really really hairy palms. As he bulks up, endlessly working the preacher curls & the resulting elephantiasis of his arms gets more pronounced, women stay further & further away….. which drives him to “entertain himself”, thus bulking up even further and the cycle repeats……

True elephantitis is not pretty or in any earthly circles considered in any way sexy or desirable… in fact quite the opposite….”Hey Gloria, he’s a super sweet guy, great personality, works from home – traveled extensively when he was younger – he was in show business……”

OK, I jest but seriously, historically – elephantitis was somewhere between, leprosy & a nice cup of peppermint syphilis tea…. and it really hasn’t ever progressed much past that….. as a matter of fact I would say, if anything, by it’s very rarity it’s become something even more feared and loathed that it used to be, when at least it still had that curiosity thing going for it….. people patronized freak shows… I know, my Mom was a Carny… and the stories she does tell…… so riddle me why someone would go out of their way to try and purposely inflate a part of their body beyond all recognition? Where is the pay-off, is it just the mere fact that people are looking, even as they utter ‘freak’ under their breath…. is it enough to know they are talking about you….. is that it?

Like I said elephantitis isn’t pretty….. but it is kind of interesting…… on someone else……

You know what they say about big feet....

The moral here, be healthy – definitely, work out – you bet – grow your muscle – without question….. if you have to start shopping at a special store…. mellow out……

Have a great day.