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Archive for April 2011

Brain Muscles, I got em’… But What if they Start to Melt

Well, I lasted another year. This freakin body of mine has been doing its damnedest to see me finally walking towards the light – but sweet baby jesus in a jumpsuit I am suuuuuper stubborn. However none of that Fiddle Faddle matters today, because it’s my Birthday… and so we lift up our hearts to … Continue reading »

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The Danger of Apple Pie

I’m not going to apologize anymore when there are gaps between my posts. Suffice to say – if I’m not posting there is a good reason. In most cases it’s because there was some problem with the animal husbandry experiments I’ve been running. We all know how gifted I am when it comes to science. … Continue reading »

You should be ashamed of Yourselves….

So for a change, let’s talk about some good news… Let’s talk about something positive, let us sally forth and hither-to shall we frolic about in the warming sunshine of eternal optimism. Let us speak not of drudgery and work-a-day constraints… op·ti·mism - [op-tuh-miz-uhm] – –noun 1. a disposition or tendency to look on the more favorable side of events or conditions and to expect the most favorable outcome. 2. the belief that good ultimately predominates over evil in the world 3. the belief that goodness pervades reality 4. the doctrine that the existing world is the best of all possible worlds. Do … Continue reading »

Hatred, Anger & the Healing Power of Cheezies

Let’s all have a wee stroll down memory lane… the reason I’m on the warfarin in the first place is because they discovered that due to my having been in A-Fib for so long, I had several blood clots floating around my giblets. They wanted to use Cardioversion to momentarily stop my heart, then restart … Continue reading »

Butt Tape & Blood on the Chicklets

Hi All, Obviously the universe has made the decision that no matter what happens, it isn’t going to make this easy for me. Those who’ve been with me since the beginning are acutely aware of the difficulties and challenges I’ve come thru, one would think I had built up a certain amount of good will … Continue reading »

We are All the Landlord

Last night the 1st Inaugural Comedy Awards were on the TV…. I told you that, to tell you this… In honour of those awards making me all laugh-y – I’m busting out an old classic…. this is a very funny sketch by Will Ferrell, probably you’ve already seen it….. if so suck it up and … Continue reading »

Don’t Just Blame the ADULTS… Kids suck too!

Last post I was telling you what’s wrong with people in general, today I want to tell you what’s wrong with the younger generation specifically. The problem with young people today is that they’ve never been exposed to germs. When I was a lad, young people weren’t concerned about microbes, germs, bacteria and other invisible, … Continue reading »

I Know You’re Frustrated… How Can I Always be This Right?….

I spent some time figuring out the worlds problems, you tend to do that when you are sitting around concentrating on breathing…. Well Ok maybe you don’t, but I do. Of course that makes sense, none of you have the resources I have, the international luminaries hanging on my every word, the hotlines to influential … Continue reading »

Jane Austen’s “Hobo with a Shotgun”

Greetings Y’all, So OK, let me tell you a little story. I realize this may well affect the way you perceive not only me, but my children as well. For those of you living in the Lower Mainland or I suppose even those of you fortunate enough to have visited our little slice of heaven, … Continue reading »

Peanut Butter, Egg Rolls & I shall return…

I’ve been wrapping up some personal business… I’ll fill you in later… I will return to posting everyday… Sunday Night April 3rd so the first new post will be ready – bright and shiny for Monday Morning…. Don’t get your hopes up too much it will still be the same old crap…. and by crap … Continue reading »

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