Pestilence, War, Famine, and Death…… Party!

I’ve returneth to make plain my summation for your certain salvation…

The revealing of the fourth seal and the culmination of our initial journey is at hand, for once bound t’gether it shall createth thou a weapon which mayst be fixed gainst the horseman whence they doth approach. (I assume no liability during an actual Apocalypse). The first horseman to appear was Pestilence, who rides upon a white horse. In the wake of Pestilence comes War, riding a wild red horse and wielding a tremendous sword. In the wake of War, due to the immense destruction, is Famine. Famine is portly, and rides upon a black, sickly horse; this represents the duality of gluttony and hunger. And in the wake of Famine comes, the final horseman, Death. His horse is pale green, the colour of rotting bloated flesh. He is followed by Hades and carries the remaining souls to their final destinations….. see accompanying photo of Death’s steed, by far the most repulsive and terrifying of the horses – so that you may be prepared whence you set eyes upon it……..notice the distinctive blood red shoes worn upon the cloven hooves, wildly unkempt mane of misery, disturbingly long equine nose….. horrible – truly a sight worthy of alarming even the most hardy souls

….

.

.

.

The Fourth Seal – Death – “When The Lamb opened the fourth seal, I heard the voice of the fourth living creature say, “Come!” I looked, and there before me was a pale horse. Its rider was named Death, and Hades was following close behind him. They were given power over a fourth of the earth to kill by sword, famine and plague, and by the wild beasts of the earth.”

Behold, this most wicked final horseman doth grab hold a place in mine countenance and lets it not go, tis interesting that death be given power to murder one quarter of earth’s population, (which coincidentally is exactly the number of idiots during rush hour who should be killed)  but I digress, Death be given the power to kill by sword, famine, plague AND “the wild beasts of the earth.” Now what makes this last section so intriguing is that during my time as Chief Game Warden in the MalaMala Game Preserve in South Africa – I had occasion to many a time stare death in the face, a ferocious – rampaging beast would charge, intent on making a meal of me or those in my charge and  thusly was it I who always came out the better. However it was in the Serengeti wherein I would make mastery of all beasts, using nothing more than my wits, compassion and a ridiculously huge elephant gun… I’ll never forget the sights I saw in Africa…

.

.

.

.

.

.

.

.

.

Two things strike me after uploading those, first what a truly marvelous & extensive collection of animal erotica I have amassed and secondly, It is so hot in Africa – seriously, it’s stupid hot, where do they get the energy? The only thing I made love to in Africa was an 8,000 BTU  GE air conditioner, named betty – We’ll move on just now, we can revisit in another post…. everyone can just relax it’s not like any of the animals are minors, I have all the paperwork to prove….ahem….. moving on…. we can discuss my being a Renaissance Tarzan another time…. and what happened to betty…

Still yet another thing struck me, for the living know that they shall die: but the dead know not anything, neither have they any more a reward; for the memory of them is forgotten. Also their love, and their hatred, and their envy, is now perished; neither have they any more a portion for ever in any thing that is done under the sun – or that which befalleth the sons of men befalleth beasts; even one thing befalleth them: as the one dieth, so dieth the other; yea, they have all one breath; so that a man hath no preeminence above a beast: for all is vanity. All go unto one place; all are of the dust, and all turn to dust again.

Tis truly fitting that I shall conclude with the key, wot should unlock thine whole puzzle… the single instruction – the fragile missive as to the animals and so shall be man counted amongst them, look upon the pure beasts of Africa shown above and lo, behold, understand……. the answer, your salvation solution and in turn, your ultimate weapon against all that shall do thou harm… is this….simply….. love….. there is no force known to be stronger, read the good book for all the evidence you need to confirm my assertion, and by good book I of course mean Harry Potter….

Be thou not stingy….. give freely and oftenly and you’ll find that not only shan’t your stores be depleted but shall grow like the loaves & fishes to feed all who hunger…. and it will be good and ne’r shall the horseman darken wherest thou dwell…….. but if they do, I still have that bad ass elephant gun……

Have a Great Great Day.

Advertisements