Arks – You can’t have One!

I was getting a bit tired going on and on about medical stuff and Indian Jones was on TV earlier so I thought maybe we could take a closer look at the actual Ark.


The Ark of the Covenant is a moderate sized piece of Acacia wood furniture, referred to in the Bible. It’s basically a large, ornate storage box which employed the use of two poles in order to carry it – allowing the Israelites to haul around the actual tablets of the Ten Commandments. Strangely, chariots had already been invented by 3000 BC, so it’s kind of silly that a couple of wheels weren’t employed in its design, experts believe it was just another example of God wanting things done the hard way. The Ark’s construction was commissioned by God, and the winning bid was received from Moses & Sons, Makers of Fine Furniture. After its construction, God communicated exclusively with Moses through the speakerphone on the Ark’s cover, an early version of OnStar.

Moses’ competitors tried to covertly access the Ark on numerous occasions, thinking it must contain something besides a public document and soon found out that “thou shalt not kill” doesn’t apply to people who mess with the box. Part of the problem was Moses’ continued claims of God being responsible for everyone who got killed while attempting to snoop, like the Nazi’s in the film. Since God allegedly wrote the commandment “thou shalt not kill”, nobody really believed it was the work of the divine. Seriously, what lord of the universe who created everything bothers to make such a pact with one family? Couldn’t the almighty simply keep his stuff somewhere really safe, like up in Heaven?

These bizarre claims only created an attractive mystery and therefore incentive for people to try and see the Ark and examine it’s contents. God’s just funny that way, I suppose. Whether it’s a “tree of life” or an Ark, God just keeps placing sensitive materials within the reach of his children and then gets angry when little Johnny plays with his stuff after being told not to… So, there is a bit of background on the ARK and perhaps some insight into God’s sense of humour or lack thereof…

Now wasn’t that a pleasant little vacation from all the medical crapola…. I know I enjoyed the break.

Have a Great Day.