Tumors, Hand Shadow Puppets & My Gift
I was doing some maintenance on the blog, you need to maintain tags, old posts, stats, comments etc.. the back-end management allows me to see, for example, how many views I’m getting, which posts get the most action and traffic, the idea being it helps the author of the post better understand what the audience/readers like. It allows you the opportunity to prune the least popular material and try to steer clear of information and posts that are unpopular. Conversely, it allows you to see what posts drive your readers wild. It makes sense to try and give your fans and subscribers what they want, or at least try and keep things as entertaining as possible.
Week after week, the single most popular post I’ve ever written, the highest visits, most views, most links and most read… ever… hands down, no question – blows the others out of the water – by far… the winning post…. is…. – Masturbatone – you sick freaks! You can’t seem to get enough… it is always ranked number one, always…. if you recall at the end of that post, I move into a discussion of – Elephantitis – and that particular affliction is always the single biggest search term used off my blog… once reading the post Y’all are so smitten with elephantitis…. you need more.
So in honour of giving the people what they want I have a few more pictures I’m willing to release of medical oddities, I enjoy them tremendously BUT frequently keep my interest relatively quiet…. until it becomes abundantly clear, Y’all are just as enthralled as me with the weirdness… Oh sure go ahead protest all you like but your clicks tell the true story.
Check out this lady from china, who has a bone disease in which her feet have grown huge and twisted around backwards…. and she’s all smiley about it.. I’d be super bitter… and super pissed that all my socks were constantly all stretched out…
Then there’s this dude with a hand so deformed not only will he only ever be able to play simple melodies on the piano, but he is going to have one hell of a time ever making decent hand shadow puppets….
Please to make your acquaintance Mr Super massive facial tumor, say – answer me this…. what is up with your face? It’s not my intention to be insensitive but after looking at this chap I have a super strong desire to find some bubble wrap… Dude have you ever heard of a little something called concealer… sold in most drug stores and you can get different colours to blend in with your skin tone.. no excuse… just none.
Then there is Mr looks like he swallowed a whole 3 tier cake and now it sits lodged in his throat guy, his head sitting up top all pleased as can be, some kind of bizarre, non-specific, balloon head macy’s day parade cake topper… he actually has more going on than just having eaten a whole cake, but I don’t want to seem like I’m picking on him. Besides, good luck finding a bowtie that fits when you have to go formal….
Finally for today, we’ll end with another severe case of leg elephantitis, it’s a man this time rather than a woman, we like to keep things all fair and equal around here…I wish you luck for your next visit to foot locker, yes I’d like the air Jordans in size 9.5 and size 804….
So given my situation, and yours – when things seem pretty dark and you feel like you have a tough road to hoe, put yourself in the shoes of one of these folks and then go back and take a look at whatever problem was bothering you and more than likely it won’t seem nearly as daunting. Cripes, I am such a giver…. making your problems all small and manageable….sometimes I can’t even fathom the depths of my generosity….
Now go out and do something good for yourself today…. and…..
Have a Great Day
I WANT THIS DISEASE!!!!!
OK… I’ll see what I can do! BUT you have to promise to send me pictures of whatever part of your body blows up…..