Getting Seasick on Waves of Emotion

Well, it’s unanimous, all the judges, including the notoriously tough Russian judge have gone and given my Head very high marks for persistence. True, it did lose points on the dismount but overall – a very impressive showing of pluck. Yes, I’m still wrestling with a significant headache and wonderfully articulate nausea, and general all-around cruddiness.

There is a something else, something new, something I can’t quite explain – it’s like a darkness or a fog that has settled over me, it’s like a perpetual feeling of being on the edge of passing out – it’s not really strong, it’s just here. It’s a heaviness around the eyes and a slowness or murkiness to my thoughts, just sort of like a wet, heavy blanket is wrapped around my head and slowing everything down, everything is in slow motion. It’s very odd and like nothing I’ve ever felt before….. I’m not a fan.

I’ve also figured out how best to describe the strange, interesting relationship I’ve been having with my body. No – this is not where I get x-rated – I’m trying to explain a difficult state of mind I’m in – It’s fair to say I haven’t much liked this whole ordeal and at times I get pretty angry at this freakin body of mine for putting me through all this. Not entirely rational perhaps, nevertheless – there it is. The continuous litany of ailments hitting me again and again, wave after wave, something clears up or temporarily recedes and something else steps up and dominate the scene for a while…. it’s just been a relentless buffet of stress, drama, fear, worry and tidal waves of emotion.

Then, during last nights fever, I had a vision…. yes, another one — the vision? I’m Bruce Lee. or Chuck Norris or Steven Seagal or Jet Li or Jackie Chan, take your pick, any martial arts star throughout history. How, how exactly am I Bruce Lee? Settle down sport, I’ll tell you…

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Anyone who’s ever seen any martial arts movie knows, at several points during the film, the hero is surrounded by a number of bad guys and even though he is grossly outnumbered, the bad guys stand idly by and courteously wait their turn and only attack one at a time. Despite handing out a serious ass kicking to the hero if they only took a moment to coordinated an attack on several fronts at once, it never happens. It just isn’t proper martial arts etiquette. Clearly I am in a fight for my life and had all my “conditions/bad guys” decided to hit me all at once – I very well may not be here writing this today. Instead, because my illnesses were adhering to a moral code bigger than either of us and only attacking me one at a time, I have been given a fighting chance to defeat them.

Last night my fever broke and my headache receded and literally within 3 minutes of me saying I was feeling better, my heart went off in a sick display of fourth of July pyrotechnics and I was dizzy, sweaty, light-headed and on the verge of passing out from the extreme arrhythmia… no lie – it lasted for about an hour and a half and as it started to calm down my headache and fever returned. It was so weird, like the meningitis was on break or something and asked the Atrial-fib to fill in while it went to the bathroom and got a little something to eat…. That’s when I had the vision…. the illnesses were working in concert to try and defeat me, the only chance I or any other super famous martial artist had – was the knowledge and understanding that they would only attack me one by one. I would have to fight and defeat each one in turn, it won’t be easy, but it is possible, by being patient and using all my skills against each specific opponent, I shall ultimately emerge the triumphant victor….

Unless those bastards change the rules and start attacking me together, then all bets are off and it becomes an ugly street fight….

Have a Great Day!

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