Don’t Just Blame the ADULTS… Kids suck too!

Last post I was telling you what’s wrong with people in general, today I want to tell you what’s wrong with the younger generation specifically. The problem with young people today is that they’ve never been exposed to germs.

When I was a lad, young people weren’t concerned about microbes, germs, bacteria and other invisible, spaced-aged hokum. We ran about with scraped knees, open cuts and played happily in the mud puddles that formed where the run-off from the slaughterhouse met the drainage pipe from the munitions factory.

I had a trail of snot running down my face from the age of three until I graduated high school and so did all of my friends. We didn’t use Kleenex or sneeze into our damned elbows. We coughed with our mouths wide open, wiped our noses on each other’s shirt sleeves and were all the stronger for it.

But these young people today? They’re a bunch of pandemic-fearing, pasty-faced hothouse flowers. Everything they touch needs to be scrubbed clean, germ-free and bathed in antiseptic lotions. From their bloody hypoallergenic cats to their HEPA-filtered air and germ resistant fabrics, the average home is more sterile than the inside of my psuedo-womb.

How the Hell do we expect young people to fight off the communism if they’ve never even had to fight off the common cold? It’s ludicrous. In my day, young people were encouraged to get sick. If a lad had the shingles, he was sent outside to take some air – not submerged in Purell, dosed with antibiotics and rushed to the hospital for a complete blood transfusion. We let our immune systems do what God intended them to do – kill our germs or kill us and thin the herd.

By the time I was a young man my immune system was so strong I could cure my sister’s rubella just by standing next to her. I hadn’t been sick in over 60 years and it’s not because I soak my vegetables in bleach, it’s because I pick a damned tomato out of my garden, rub it on my trousers and then eat it.

Take it from me – if these young people really want to beat disease the best thing they can do is get out of their hermetically sealed homes, shed their latex gloves and N95 surgical masks and go muck out a stable or two. And if they don’t, it won’t be long before we’re nothing but a nation of asthmatic bubble boys who’ll drop over dead the first time they eat a piece of cheese 3 days past its expiry date.

They’ve never been exposed to germs. That’s the problem with young people today.


Have a Great Day

PS – By way of clarification I wasn’t sick for 60 years until these last few years… then it’s all gone completely to hell…. If only they had Purell 50 years ago….