Hot & Stupid… a Winning Combo

So it’s late and only now have the flames begun to die down from the scorched earth that is everything I see outside my window. It’s never easy being forced to watch another human being burst into flames, it’s sad, scary and yet oddly captivating – no two people burn in quite the same way.

After a few hours of watching people incinerate themselves by choosing to walk outside, I tired of it, besides the smell had become unbearable… I found myself wandering mentally, as I am frequently prone to do – and when I do take these little waking head siestas I often return to the questions that I’ve yet to find sensible solutions for, such as;

  • Why do we put suits in garment bags and garments in a suitcase?
  • If I melt dry ice, can I take a bath without getting wet?
  • Why is it that bullets ricochet off of Superman’s chest, but he ducks when the empty gun is thrown at him?
  • Why do tourists go to the tops of tall buildings and then put money into telescopes so they can see things on the ground close-up?
  • Why do we press harder on a remote control when we know the batteries are getting weak?
  • Why do banks charge a fee on “insufficient funds” when they know there is not enough?
  • Why doesn’t glue stick to the bottle?
  • Why doesn’t Tarzan have a beard?
  • Why is it that no matter what color bubble bath you use the bubbles are always white?
  • How do those dead bugs get into those enclosed light fixtures?

You can see how much time I spend trying to solve the Sphinx like riddles that still plague mankind. I wonder why I wonder what I wonder when I wonder these wonderous wonderments.

I agree this is a stupid post but please refer back to the beginning – people are bursting into flames, so the fact that I was able to write anything at all is a minor miracle.

Have a great day.

Advertisements